Dogs and Goddesses: Chapter six part one: Shar’s Freaking Dream

When we last left Shar and Wolfie, Wolfie had his teeth in the ankle of the figure from the bas-relief that Shar was so hot and bothered about.

He’d looked good last night Tasered on her bedroom floor, but in the morning, in the sunlight, he was divine.

Expect more bad god puns — there are a TON.

“You’re not bleeding. How is this possible?”

“I’m a god.” He took another bite out of the muffin he was holding.

He even ate muffins like a god.

Shar realized she was hyperventilating.

I think this is a fairly adequate response to the events, don’t you? 😀

You know, I didn’t realize until I was typing this how many short sentences and one-sentence paragraphs this book has. Yeesh. I prefer sentences to have a little more…. substance to them. But then, I adore Pride and Prejudice, which I’m told makes me utterly insane because I can read the prose with no problem, so there you have it.

He looked like the bas-relief

Two-dimensional? FREAKY.

Shar comes to her senses, frets that he might be insane, and goes to call 911. Also, yells at her dog for talking. Then realizes how stupid that is and decides, yet again, that she’s asleep. Which. Didn’t we JUST do this? Like, a page ago?

She could kick god ass in a dream; anybody could kick god ass in a dream. It was her freaking dream.

Fuck yeah! I want to read this spinoff comic now. Shar’s fucking dream. What what.

Then it takes a turn for the creepy:

“I am here because I rose in the room of the sun, as always. The room in the temple that holds my heart.”

Shar froze. “Tell me that’s a metaphor.”

Spoiler: it’s probably not. YIKES.

Anyway, Ray shows up to… take Shar’s TV? Apparently he bought it and wants it back, so he just walks right in to take it. What a prick. Samu offers to smite Ray, and Shar tells him to go ahead, resulting in a small burn between Ray’s eyes.

Woah. Okay, he’s an asshole, but let’s not go around burning people. Is this going to be one of those books/movies where the asshole falls off a roof and down six flights of stairs and is in a full-body cast and it’s funny because he’s an asshole? Because we as a culture need to stop doing that. Then again, she thinks she’s dreaming, so it makes sense for her to do.

Shar finally realizes it’s not a dream when the paint she ordered arrives. Well, that’s an odd trigger, but sure, why not. Samu wants to find Kammani, and Shar is kind of sure that’d be a bad idea, so she tells him Kammani’s in LA, teaches him how to hitchike, and sends him on his way.

This. What? What is this book doing? This guy has no idea how to function in modern society and she just… okay whatever.

Part two next week!

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One Response to Dogs and Goddesses: Chapter six part one: Shar’s Freaking Dream

  1. Pingback: Deconstruction Round Up, March 8th, 2013 | The Slacktiverse

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